Wednesday, November 18, 2009

~ The Decision ~

Last night, in my Dale Carnegie Course class, we were asked to share the defining moment in our lives. Well, 5 months ago, I made a decision that has made an abrupt change to my life.

5 months ago, I was working in the Corporate & Investment Banking division of one of the largest Islamic Bank in the world. I really love what I was doing. My day to day job included analysing the financial standing of our clients. From time to time I had to travel for site visits either locally or abroad. The industry was very competitive I would say. We have to ensure we work very fast to be able to close the deal. The datelines for new tasks were always yesterday! Not only my day at work was tiring, I also had to endure 2 hours of traffic every morning and another 2 hours in the evening.

The stress at work and the stress from the traffic really drained my energy. To be able to reach office at 8.30am, I had to leave at 6.30 am. I usually reached home at 8pm earliest. Maybe on some good days I could reach home at 7.30 pm. But on busy days, I might only leave office at midnight. When I reached home, I was already too tired to cook or play with my son. All I wanted was just a good rest and sleep. Day by day, I became more cranky and grumpier. I snapped at my husband and I scolded my son on a daily basis.

One day, it dawned on me that my life was miserable. All the money I earned meant nothing. I rarely see my friends anymore. Or more like I never see my friends anymore. I was mean at home. So, I started asking myself, is this what I want? Is this how I want to grow my son? By scolding and scream at him every single day? For how long? Do I want to be like my bosses who are always in the office? And my answers to all the questions were NO.

This incident happened on a Friday. On the very next Monday, I tendered my 3 months notice. My bosses were surprised. My colleagues were shocked. They did not expect this from me. In the beginning, of course I had doubts. Was I making the right decision? What if I don't like my new job? What if I miss analysing the financials? How about my salary? Would I still be able to sustain my lifestyle? But I brushed all the questions off. I told myself, this is something I had to do and sacrifice for the better of my family.

After my 3 months notice ended, I spent half a month 24 7 with my son. Our relationship grew stronger. I cooked for him, I played with him, I sang and danced with him. It was the greatest 2 weeks of my life.

On 1st October, I started my new job in Damansara. Though the distance to my new office is only 4km less than my old bank, the traffic is great! Even if I leave the house at 8 am, I could still reach my office on time and on some lucky days, I could even have a quick breakfast with my colleagues first before work starts. The workload is just nice. As I am working in a different industry, I found it not as stressing as analysing the financials of a company and worrying whether the client could meet its financial obligations. In the evening, if I leave my office at 5.30pm sharp, I would be able to reach home before 6.30 pm.

I now have time to walk my son to the playground and spend quality time with him. After maghrib, I will cook for my husband. With constant practice, I think my cooking skill has improved tremendously. Though of course there is still huge room for improvement.  Last weekend, my husband told me that he has noticed the change in me. I am a nicer person now. I am not as grumpy and cranky as I was a couple of months back. I am glad he noticed it and mentioned it to me. That has really made my day..

I know I am a happier person now. So, I guess I made the right decision after all.

Oh, and this is Adam's latest picture. Isn't he very tall?


daddy riki said...

LOL u must have misheard me. I was complaining your cooking that time.

A'a Nazzirah said...

u did the verry rightest desicion kak kem. glad to see u guys happy :)

p/s : pas ni adam mesti ade adik kan atehh kannn. hehehehe...

mommy kam said...

how could YOU!!!!!

mommy kam said...

a'a, belum lagi.. lekk dulu.. bagi adam enjoy happy2 dengan mommy dulu.. :)

::nyetto:: said...


this is inspiring. thanks for sharing. i am actually in the stage of exploring the grass on the other side, which will enable me to spend more time for my family, like u just did!

Unknown said...


Yes, indeed it's very inspiring. I hope you have always enjoyed the life with you beloved family so that everybody will be happy with your companion. I think you have made a right decision to swift the job for the better...while you are still young to explore new things in life that would affect others who love you. It's the quality of one's life that is of utmost importance.

mommy kam said...

nyetto + zaini,

Glad to hear the post could inspire you.. As our lives evolves, our values and priority change as well. What could be very important before might not be as important now. Sometimes when we work so hard to achieve something, we tend to forget why and to whom we want to achieve it for. Hence, we hurt many along the way.. :)

Mummy Shiqin said...

Owh Kam.. such an inspiring story.. i'm still stuck in the corp finance world!..... poor taufiq.. he still hv a bad mother like me.. and good for adam.. the loving mummy kam is back!

mommy kam said...

Thanks Iqin, it's good that you could juggle between your career and Taufiq so you could have both career satisfaction and happy family..

I do miss the financial figures from time ti time but I guess Adam's smiles and hugs cure it all.. ehehhe.. so how's your new maid? hope all is well with you and taufiq:)

Anonymous said...

I am glad that you are happy now. yes, work and career isn't everything. At the end of the day, family is the most important and it is them you can count on. I consider myself lucky cause my current company practise flexi hour and they believe in having a balance in life.

Btw, of course lah Adam tinggi. Tgk la mommy and daddy dia.

P/s: I love cooking too~ Best bila hubby makan sampai licin kan? hehe

mommy kam said...

nette, i envy u for having the best of both world.. i am starting to love what i do now as well..

never before i thought that me n cooking could end up in a sentence :p with the maid around, cooking does not come with hours of cleaning the mess anymore.. Yeah bila hubby makan siap tambah ada rasa one kind of satisfaction kan.. Lagi2 kalau dia puji rasa macam all the effort are worth it.. Hint.. Hint.. :p